Politician's stand-up comedy routine bombs at the Midwinter Ball... and who had the country's political and media elite in stitches: All the insider detail from Parliament's night of nights

By NICHOLAS COMINO, POLITICAL REPORTER, AUSTRALIA Published: 04:04, 2 July 2026 | Updated: 04:04, 2 July 2026 One of the enduring traditions of the Midwinter Ball is the annual speech from both the Prime Minister and Opposition Leader. This year, the gap between the two performances was stark. While the content of the speeches is off the record, Daily Mail can reveal Anthony Albanese won the room with ease - including with a joke about his bank account being hacked.  By contrast, Angus Taylor struggled to land a joke, with many guests agreeing he 'bombed'. Taylor's performance was made even worse by last year's dinner, when then Opposition Leader Sussan Ley was unexpectedly a standout of the night. Taylor's résumé may include a Rhodes Scholarship and top academic honours from the University of Sydney, but if his Midwinter Ball appearance is anything to go by, stand-up comedy is not an obvious career pivot. Not that leading the Federal Liberal Party offers much job security at the best of times. Taylor's (right) comedy stylings landed flat with the audience, with some saying he 'bombed' Prime Minister Anthony Albanese will soon serve up one of his fiercest critics on the tennis court, after mortgage broker Joseph Daoud paid $16,500 at a charity auction to secure a match against the PM at The Lodge. Mr Daoud, founder of It's Simple Finance and an outspoken opponent of Labor's tax hikes, successfully bid on a Midwinter Ball auction item touting a 'not-to-be-missed opportunity' to play tennis with Albanese. The prize includes a tennis match at The Lodge and 'hospitality and generous refreshments' for four guests. Daoud recently spent $17,500 on a billboard campaign attacking the PM’s 'ambition tax'. In the Federal Budget, Albanese junked the 50 per cent capital gains tax discount and negative gearing, which allowed property investors to claim back the expenses on their properties.   Finance Minister Katy Gallagher, unfazed by the result, told Daily Mail it was 'great' the auction had raised $16,500. 'The Prime Minister will love that,' she said. Deputy Liberal leader Jane Hume, a major critic of the Albanese government's budget, was overjoyed by the news. Mortgage broker Joseph Daoud (left) bid $16,500 to play tennis with Anthony Albanese  Finance Minister Katy Gallagher (right)  said that the Prime Minister 'will love' the tennis match  'That's game, set and match,' she told Daily Mail. A separate auction prize featuring Hume and Opposition Leader Angus Taylor attracted a smaller winning bid of $5,000. This package offered the chance to be 'wined and dined by the Leader of the Opposition, Angus Taylor' with Hume promising her 'Instagram-famous cocktails on arrival'. The dinner will take place at Taylor's 'Southern NSW residence.' Another auction item, 'Warm up and wind down with David Pocock', sold for $3,100. This experience gives the winning bidder the chance to join ACT independent senator David Pocock for a session at Canberra Floating Saunas. 'Join ACT Independent Senator David Pocock and the chance to both warm up and wind down while taking in some of Canberra's best views at our [literal] hottest new venue, Canberra Floating Saunas,' the auction listing read. The fallout from allegations a consultant accessed Anthony Albanese's Commonwealth Bank mortgage records was impossible to ignore at this year's Midwinter Ball. Accounting giant EY is under scrutiny after claims an EY graduate, while on secondment at Commonwealth Bank, improperly accessed the Prime Minister's banking details - a saga that continues to reverberate through Canberra. Amid the controversy, EY chief executive David Larocca was expected to host the firm's table at the Press Gallery's annual event, but withdrew at the last minute. Chief economist Cherelle Murphy and managing partner Louise MacDonald stepped in to represent the firm. Despite this, EY was still listed proudly as a sponsor on the pamphlets placed on each table.   Several high-profile political names gave this year's Midwinter Ball a miss. One Nation leader Pauline Hanson skipped the event, along with every member of her parliamentary team. Barnaby Joyce was the only One Nation figure on the official guest list, but failed to turn up. Another notable missing person - who had a ticket - was former NSW Liberal treasurer Matt Kean, now chair of the federal government's Climate Change Authority (CCA). Kean is facing criticism from MPs after it emerged that taxpayers funded a $32,000 trip for him to attend the COP30 climate conference in Brazil. During the trip, Kean also appeared on a panel run by his private-sector employer, Wollemi Capital. Both the CCA and Climate Change Minister Chris Bowen have stood by Kean, confirming all disclosures were properly handled. Also absent from the ballroom was Finn McCarthy, husband of Communications Minister Anika Wells and a previous regular at the event. The minister has kept a noticeably lower profile following last year's expenses scandal, which saw Wells repay over $10,000 to taxpayers for travel claims.  Communications Minister Anika Wells (pictured) attended the Midwinter Ball solo this year The Midwinter Ball red carpet delivered no shortage of talking points, with guests using fashion to showcase everything from designer labels to political messages. Jodie Haydon, wife of Prime Minister Anthony Albanese, drew plenty of attention in a striking Leo Lin gown.  Albanese's office was quick to point out to Daily Mail that the dress had been 'loaned'. Labor frontbencher Anne Aly took a more hands-on approach, arriving in a gown she crocheted herself from recycled cotton.  Aly told Daily Mail she completed the piece in just three weeks. She was also sporting a necklace with an ancient Egypt design, paying tribute to her Egyptian heritage.    Jodie Haydon (left) wearing a Leo Lin gown, which Albanese's office stressed was 'loaned'  Minister Anne Aly (pictured) wearing a gown she crocheted herself in just three weeks  Allegra Spender (left) wearing a Carla Zampatti gown she said was fresh off the runway  Georgie Purcell (left) wore a dress that said 'defund dog racing' and 'love dogs' on the back Victorian upper house MP Georgie Purcell turned her outfit into a campaign statement.  The Animal Justice Party MP arrived with her partner, Labor MP Josh Burns, wearing a dress emblazoned with 'defund dog racing' on the front and 'love dogs' on the back. Wentworth and Community Strong Party MP Allegra Spender opted for high fashion, wearing a Carla Zampatti gown from the label founded by her late mother. Spender told Daily Mail the design came straight from the brand's latest runway collection. At the other end of the price spectrum, Teal independent Nicolette Boele revealed her gown cost just $18 after she picked it up at an op shop in her electorate. The comments below have not been moderated. The views expressed in the contents above are those of our users and do not necessarily reflect the views of MailOnline. By posting your comment you agree to our house rules. Do you want to automatically post your MailOnline comments to your Facebook Timeline? Your comment will be posted to MailOnline as usual. Do you want to automatically post your MailOnline comments to your Facebook Timeline? 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