There are just certain moments in sports that can bring a tear to your eye and make you proud to be an American.
The Wienie 500 is one of those moments.
Last year’s inaugural race — held on Carb Day, the final day of practice before the Indianapolis 500 — featured six Oscar Mayer Wienermobiles racing around the Brickyard, with Slaw Dog claiming the maiden victory.
It was magic.
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Six giant motorized hot dogs racing around one of the most iconic 2.5-mile tracks on the Earth.
It's a cliché, but the European mind truly can't comprehend that. They'd probably call them "sausages" too, instead of hot dogs or wieners.
Technically, they are sausages, but hot dogs occupy their own uniquely American category.
I'll die on this hill.
The festivities got underway with comedian Andy Richter serving as Commander in Beef and singing the Oscar Mayer jingle with a barbershop quartet while dressed like Lyle Lanley from the "Marge vs. the Monorail" episode of "The Simpsons."
After that, Richter gave the command to fire up the glizzies.
All the talk going into this race centered on the new addition to the field, Corn Dog, who introduced a controversial aero package that included a stick.
Corn Dog managed to pick up a place at the start, but the action was at the sharp end of the field with a very questionable bit of defending from Chi Dog that sent the Seattle Dog off the track in an act of self-preservation.
On the final lap of the two-lap sprint, we were treated to some incredible three-wiener-wide racing down the backstretch.
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I mean, the stones on these wieners to send it like that.
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New York Dog was practically shot out of a cannon, and that move on the backstretch proved to be the winning one.
The crowd wasn't crazy about it, but in the annals of Wienie 500 — all two years, but I think that's enough to count as an annal — that was an instant classic.
Corn Dog was a little underwhelming, but the added drag from that stick may have done them in.
Well, they’ve got 365 days to get that thing into the wind tunnel and roll out an upgrade package for 2027.
